Black Lives Matter

 photo via www.thestorkandthebeanstalk.com

photo via www.thestorkandthebeanstalk.com

I have not posted in 8 days. We are grieving. We are increasingly allowing ourselves to FEEL the full impact of the way the systems we have created are failing us, and in there somewhere is a tiny opening when change becomes possible. Shame is where we have been stuck- shame freezes us exactly where we are, so blaming shaming language is part of the problem, but feeling the fullness of our outrage and sadness and grief and disgust mean that we are allowing ourselves to be touched by this, to feel that on the deepest level there are no humans unaffected, that the oppression of any one group eventually hurts all groups…and when these invitations to greater awareness of this rip through our communities, it makes it hard to do things like work. It makes me feel like a complete a-hole for trying to sell a necklace when there are children out there that just lost their parents because of the failure of an experiment that is contemporary american "culture". Like when it comes to our institutions, the way they where designed was based on a lord of the flies style power game that we have allowed to persist and accept as “the way things are” for a duration of time that there is simply no excuse for.

I have to be honest. I become cripplingly overwhelmed when considering taking on these systems through politics. I have been grateful for those who provided lists of what we can do that might actually make a difference, (here's just one for those of you who are so inclined: https://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/08/06/this-is-what-white-people-can-do-to-support-blacklivesmatter/  ) and have emerged from reading them all and contemplating my roll with the truth that all approaches are needed, it's all hands on deck, so those who say provide bodywork to others who organize rallys are doing their part in their own way. My way has been to slowly begin to open my temple doors to white males, the group who has historically scared me the most, and bring my creativity to the rekindling of innocence and heart centered consciousness and respect for the cooperative, gentle way of doing things as valid, even often more effective in the long term. These values render one increasingly incapable of making decisions that affect the whole that don’t consider and support the wellbeing of the whole. Yes, perhaps my choice to dismantle patriarchy from the inside out, one person at a time (through working deeply, patiently, tenderly with the wounded little boys inside these men <and inside myself>  who may one day be in a position of power significant enough to make decisions about how to run the third dimension) Maybe it’s not enough in these times. I don’t know, but it’s what I’ve got and I’m giving it with all my heart.  (photo via aim.com